These are the quick and easy steps to build a community of drones:
- Make friends.
- Promote them so they will promote you.
- Screw them over/ ignore them/ use them/drop them while becoming friends with their friends.
- Repeat as needed.
In no time, you’ll be praised for your community building skills thanks to those drone followers that are too blind to see the obvious manipulation, too needy to question your quality, and too afraid to quit your empty cheerleading message.
Isn’t social media great?!
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So so so true. And the worst part is that all those drones won’t even understand what you’re saying here.
I’m hoping they will remember this and think if they qualify as drones in the “communities” they belong.
But that’s a lot of hope for one man to have…
So if I’m reading this correctly, social media = Ponzi scheme? Sounds about right.
I think I’ll stick to making real friends and swearing a lot.
Fuck yeah.
Interesting read. I think step 3 is where they really do become drones as opposed to a real community. Relationships take time and need to be nurtured and maintained. Then you’ll create a community of loyal followers rather than drones.
Drones are very loyal.
I don’t care about loyalty, I care more about independent thinkers. If they’ll leave me because I don’t provide enough value anymore, so be it.
That’s the greater good.
Yes. But you already know what I think.
Also, Tim brings up an interesting point that the drones are unlikely to read between the lines of what you’re saying here.
So how do people know they’ve become drones in someone else’s “community?” And how do we take down the queen bees who use social media to do this to people? Not just a question for Carlos, but for everyone commenting here.
Monica,
I just wrote a song about this but thinking on relationships. It is profound ignorance in a way. We can’t know what we don’t know and how do we know what we don’t see?
Ya, I don’t have the answer.
I feel like people should be more perceptive. But it’s hard, I agree, especially to see what you can’t see.
Do you think it’s up to us to tell people what they aren’t seeing? Or is it just spiteful?
Here is what I believe.
I believe ‘can’t see’ is the wrong word. Anyone ‘could see’ and it is just that they ‘don’t see.’ Does that make sense?
To your last comment, hell ya it is. That is everything that I do. I try to tell people exactly what I see but knowing that what I see is not always right. It is how I view life and how I try to help others. Tell them what no one else would. Good or Bad. People can’t change if they didn’t know what they’re doing is wrong. Make sense?
Even if you hurt or damage somebody else’s work in the process?
Yeah, I see Carlo’s point. I think people have to make the decision themselves. You can present the information objectively, but one person telling them something is not going to change their minds *unless* they have also seen the pattern. Or they are sheep
Do you guys agree?
Hurt and Damage is never a good thing. Is there an example of being honest that will hurt or damage something? I live and breathe Respect and that is the key I always try to use.
If you feel it will hurt or damage someone you should still be honest but then you should have a solution that can help them… Does that make sense?
I think the solution is that they read this post.
I’m trying to think if I’m a drone to anyone’s community…
We talk.
We support.
We hope.
We wait.
Not one of those strategies is as effective as pointing fingers. But at least they are ethical and I can sleep at night.
I’m thinking now as well…
I am just jumping in on this comment, but I think that pointing fingers is ineffective as well as unethical. I used to be someone who ‘told people what they didn’t see,’ and in the process alienated lots of friends. Criticism just turns people off. When was the last time you made a big change because a friend or anyone said “hey, you are kind of throwing your life away, you need to do X instead.” But, engaging ‘the drones’ in a true community is a sure way to get them to wake up to reality.
? Maybe- That is my experience with pointing out flaws, thoughts?
Agreed. There is a fine line between telling the truth because you care (positive) and pointing fingers (negative). It also depends on the person you are telling and how comfortable they are with confrontation.
Not only I agree, I wrote about it before: http://www.owlsparks.com/listening/calling-out-doesnt-work/
However, that’s mainly focused on one person, just like your example.
I would only engage the drones WHILE pointing fingers, so that they would see what I’m talking about… but we are still dealing with the ethical problem.
As I said to Andrew on his post: You may not be able to do anything about them, but you can do something about yourself. Keep doing what you’re doing, keep being who you are and sincere and honest in that. Because you will find success there– from what I can tell, you already have.
In the long run, that’s what’s going to matter. And the people who matter will remain by your side and everyone else will fall to the wayside. What you — and Carlos…and others in this blogging community — have formed are strong connections and friendships based on sincerity and not calculations. Hold onto that. Because you’re the kind of people people are going to want to turn to.
Just my two cents.
I think there’s a bigger goal here, though. I don’t think Monica, or me, or you for that matter, are worried about what’s gonna happen to us.
We are worried about the damage others are doing instead. We care for the world, if you will. Just like other issues, we just don’t want to sit back anymore.
Online communities are quite similar to off-line communities, especially political and business communities.
I’ve found that it’s better just to listen most of the time, and to tune out all the dissonant static. Otherwise, it’s the easiest way for me to tune into the thoughts, ideas, and desires of other, younger generations.
I get your first idea, but you lost me on the second one, care to elaborate?
Smiling… Great. Post.
Ego is a powerful thing. Not just the queen bee’s but the drones’. Someone important reaches out to you, you respond and then comment and then RT and feel all warm & fuzzy and important because of it.
And truly, if I were to make one over-arching comment about all of social media, it would be that it is a series of networks designed to reward people’s egos.
Interesting points Elisa. If you tell everyone they are special, that’s really like telling no one they are special. It’s collecting trophies, not forming relationships.
I think social media can be about rewarding people’s egos – or it can be about genuine conversation. I have made genuine friendships with several people online, like Carlos, Norcross, and Jun Loayza, and that has nothing to do with whether I read their blogs or RT them or anything (because we so rarely retweet each other). We don’t need to do that to know we’re friends because we are not BSing each other about how much we’re interested.
The other thing about forming real relationships is that you can’t form them with everyone. You have to invest a lot with a few people. People (the queen bees) who claim they are everyone’s best friend are full of shit.
You can have a big blog community if you write crazy amazing content all the time (Seth Godin) or if you suck up to people long enough to make them subscribe (…..).
I just talked to my bro on this tonight… I just find it is a way to meet anyone in the world. Not all use it like me, but I love it.
Stowe Boyd said, “I am better by the sum of my connections and so are my connections.” That’s it.
Thanks,
Shane
“You have to invest a lot with a few people.”
I think this is the most misunderstood aspect of “social media.” People think they’re supposed to walk around telling everyone else how awesome they are, and smiling, and high fiving. In reality, communicating online is just that – communicating online. Why should it be any different than how you communicate through other channels?
I doubt people walk around the mall all day telling every person they bump into how “super cool” or “awesome” they are.
Be yourself. Block the people you don’t like. Tell the people you agree with that you agree with them. Question those you would question elsewhere.
All this superficial communication helps no one.
All sounds beautiful, except the last part: Question those you would question elsewhere.
Don’t underestimate people’s defensiveness.
Agreed to an extent.Most of my Twitter contacts know they can have a skype call with me and a virtual beer anytime. There are real connections.
The BS comes with all those “I love people” statements…
I love you.
Perhaps aiming to build a community around yourself is the ultimate form of narcissism. And perhaps this narcissism feeds on the thoughtless brains of drones.
IMHO, communities on non-drones are fundamentally united a common commitment to an idea or cause, not an individual.
Not sure I agree. Or maybe I would put it this way: sometimes communities can be behind an individual because that individual represents the ideal.
I like your amendment.
I think it starts with asking one’s self the question, “Am I a drone?”
But even then, they may be okay with it. Regardless of the queen bee’s perceived lack of integrity, quality content, etc., the drones are getting something out of being there, somethings keeping them around.
Not everyone reads for quality content. As with music, there are multiple things that can grab us in.
Similar to the relationship between a drug and a fiend, or a love-struck person blindly in love; the destructive nature of the relationship, or the lack thereof is irrelavant, as long as people are getting something out of it. Especially when it’s good vibes like a pat on the back or an ego boost.
Couldn’t have said it better myself. Brilliant as usual, Robert.
Sometimes I think you must be an unhappy person, but then I remember this photo of you in your undies http://exilelifestyle.com/inspiration/magnetic-bromance/ and realize I must be mistaken.
I’m seriously the happiest person you will ever meet.
My posts are strong manifestations of how much I care about changing things that I think are wrong and harmful to society.
I don’t know where to insert my comment so I’ll tag it off the end of this, but kudos to the comments already tacked to this little blog post. Carlos, you’re a man of well-chosen words.
I think drawing a line in the sand around the process of becoming a Drone/Follower and hoping to map the idea of communities on top is problematic. We’re criticizing the people who’re touting their role as a leader/visionary/primary contributor to the thought in some circle; or possibly not even touting it – maybe the Drones just bestow someone with a measurable amount of influence or reward them with access to a whole bunch of other people via a leapfrog affect. “Oh Drone leader, please impregnate my audience/friends with your timely message and leave me feeling like I’m smarter or more productive despite having been treated like a two-dollar whore”. That’s sort of what we’re getting at, yes?
So yeah, I see that happen a lot. People call themselves Social Media Experts. Enterprising thought leaders network their way to public perception with total disregard to meaningful ‘community’; they commoditize community.
But arguing that people need to be saved is like trying to explain away market dynamics. Supply and demand.
And honestly who gives a shit? The people we would emulate…the ones who have an audience and community and still provide value both as a representative and as a steward of a herd of followers who ALSO represent and contribute to the core mantra…those people (Godin was mentioned) are generally people who provide their community with tools. They hand over the keys and say DO SOMETHING AWESOME. Don’t talk about it. Do it. Don’t attack or complain, just have a mantra and help one another succeed.
I tend to look at everyone out there who’s got influence and ask myself if I’d pick them for my team in a pick up soccer game. You’d be surprised how quickly you stop listening to and worrying about everyone else.
Thanks for your poetry Derek
“And honestly who gives a shit?”
I do, but I’m realizing that my ONLY choice is to ignore other people’s lousy work. I won’t change the way they think by pointing out what I think it’s wrong. Not that I enjoy ignoring it, but again, I don’t think there’s anything else I can do. I’ll have to lead by example, do awesome things and hope I’ll inspire people with my actions.
I CAN be the one that doesn’t worry about everyone else. But I can’t help to feel a little down by taking that path. The fighter in me wants to speak up!
Woah! sounds like someone got burned! Well at least that’s not what everyone’s doing with social media.
Honestly, I didn’t. But it pains me to see what’s happening to other people thanks to some manipulative work.
Clearly, you know how I feel about this.
And, I have to say, this one line within this sentence is one of the most poignant you’ve ever written, in my opinion: “…too needy to question your quality…”
EXACTLY.
Fuck, Carlos. EXACTLY.
Thank you my love.
K-blam! Nice post Carlos.
True, painfully so, so often.
Hm. I wrote two VERY long comments on this post. Don’t see ‘em now. Is this thing on?
Carlos, I really enjoy your perspective, but you really ought to have a strong opinion once in a while.
JHep
You’re saying I don’t have a strong opinion? That’s interesting.